Gerald Swanson

Contrary to popular belief, Lorem Ipsum is not simply random text. It has roots in a piece of classical Latin literature from 45 BC, making it over 2000 years old. Richard McClintock, a Latin professor at Hampden-Sydney College in Virginia, looked up one of the more obscure Latin words, consectetur, from a Lorem Ipsum passage, and going through the cites of the word in classical literature, discovered the undoubtable source. Lorem Ipsum comes from sections 1.10.32 and 1.10.33 of “de Finibus Bonorum et Malorum” (The Extremes of Good and Evil) by Cicero, written in 45 BC. This book is a treatise on the theory of ethics, very popular during the Renaissance. The first line of Lorem Ipsum, “Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet..”, comes from a line in section 1.10.32.

GERALD

Two hundred percent double-barreled
Our harbinger of happiness, our herald

We laud him at length
For his savvy, his strength —

We’re speaking, of course, about Gerald

Don’t be fooled by his easy jocularity —
His mind has a laser-beam clarity:

Broad comprehension,
Sharp focused attention —

Truly, this man is a rarity

Gerald is driven — by data
For him every test is a beta

Facts are his friends
He teases out trends —

He is worth millions (pro rata)

Gerald eats data for dinner
With a grasp spanning outer to inner

Add his proclivity
For sheer creativity —

Truly, this man is a winner

In social media Gerald is thriving
Facebook and Twitter — high fiving

Snapchat – he’s jiving
Tumblr — deep diving

With Gerald, man, we are arriving

So get ready for inquiries, apps
He’s putting us clearly on maps

This marathon runner
This finish line stunner —

We’ll cheer him in victory laps

A professor of widespread acclaim
An author — a book bears his name

A consultant who’s known
By successes he’s shown —

He deserves every bit of his fame

May his name be incanted and caroled —
With praises and plaudits appareled —

He’s back with the home team
The great Golden Dome team —

Lead us to victory, Gerald!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, GERALD!

May 27, 2015